Original air date: 7/7/1999
In the first post-movie episode, South Park Elementary is visited by a man in a panda costume who teaches about sexual harassment. When Stan calls Cartman an "ass sucker", Cartman sues Stan and, by extent, the school. This leads all the children to pursue legal action against the school whenever they feel like they've been harassed, which means big bucks for Kyle's lawyer father and drives the school to the brink of bankruptcy.
"Sexual Harassment Panda" contains the following examples:
- 555: The telephone number in Gerald's Kitschy Local Commercial is 1-555-SUE THEM.
- Amoral Attorney: Gerald, who abuses the system so he can win heaps of money.
- Artistic License – Law: Most (if not, all) of the lawsuits would never hold up in court in real life, not to mention Gerald representing both sides of one court case. Justified, as this was done to show what happens when people sue others for frivolous reasons and also because this is South Park.
- Becoming the Mask: All the denizens of the Island of Misfit Mascots believe they're the animals they're dressed as, and implying they're just guys in costumes is a quick way to invoke their wrath.
- Berserk Button: Don't ever, ever suggest the mascots at the Island of Misfit Mascots aren't real animals.
- Better Living Through Evil: Gerald represents everyone in South Park in a number of frivolous sexual harassment lawsuits that leave South Park Elementary and much of the rest of the town destitute and the Brovlovskis in a palatial new home. When Kyle questions the morality of this, Gerald can only reply, "Just look at this house, Kyle!"
- Blinded by the Sun: One mascot on the island warns of this danger.
- Blind Justice: The court uses a seal of Lady Justice's face complete with her scales and blindfold.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Petey as the Don't Sue People Panda.
- Cutting Corners: South Park Elementary cuts its funding sharply due to various lawsuits, including the absence of desks and Mr. Garrison writing on the blackboard with a rusty nail.
- Distinction Without a Difference: Gerald's rationalization of sexual harassment lawsuits:Gerald: You see, Kyle, we live in a liberal, democratic society. And Democrats make sexual harassment laws. These laws tell us what we can and can't say in the workplace. And what we can and can't do in the workplace.
Kyle: Isn't that fascism?
Gerald: No, because we don't call it fascism. Do you understand? - The Dog Bites Back: Pip sues Cartman for $1.4 million, given that Cartman is one of the kids who picked on him since day one.
- Don't Answer That: Gerald advises his child clients at school not to answer the teacher's question lest they risk getting sued for their answer.
- Drowning My Sorrows: Sexual Harassment Panda ends up in a pub after losing his job in school and being told that his services are not needed anymore.
- Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": For some reason, everyone in this episode calls Gerald "Kyle's Dad". Even he calls himself "Kyle's Dad" on a commercial advertising his services (the latter is justified, as the commercial is aimed at Kyle's classmates).
- Evil Is Petty: One of the things Cartman takes from Stan is his asthma inhaler, despite having no use for it.
- The Faceless: We never see what Sexual Harassment Panda looks like under his costume. It doesn't help that he seriously thinks he's a real panda.
- Frivolous Lawsuit: Gerald encourages a string of frivolous sexual harassment suits (that mainly consist of people saying things like "suck my dick" as an insult) that culminates in a suit called "Everyone vs. Everyone", in which he represented both sides.
- Hypocritical Humor:
- Gerald keeps disrupting class by offering legal advice to the various students. Mr. Garrison denounces having a lawyer present and criticizes the children, only for Gerald to give him legal advice, which causes him to backtrack.
- Sexual Harassment Panda balks at having to go to the Island of Misfit Mascots, saying that place is for loser mascots that don't make sense.
- During the "we don't take kindly" running gag, Stan throws it back in his face that the kids don't take kindly to him. Skeet responds that they don't take kindly to folks who don't take kindly to other people, causing everyone to stop and realize he just contradicted himself.
- It's What I Do: Sexual Harassment Panda says as much during his failed job interview after he got sacked at school:"I can't help what I am."
- Karma Houdini: If Gerald was made to pay restitution for the lawsuits he filed, we sure don't see it happen.
- Kitschy Local Commercial: Gerald's commercial for his legal aid is of poor quality.
- Laser-Guided Karma: Cartman kickstarts the whole mess when he throws a Frivolous Lawsuit against Stan and takes half his stuff. He is later sued by Pip, who in turn takes half of his stuff.
- Lost in Character: Petey thinks he's an actual panda. For that matter, all the mascots on the Island of Misfit Mascots believe they are what they're dressed as, and trying to tell them otherwise will only invite anger upon you. This is especially amusing with Willy the Don't Stare Directly Into the Sun Worm, who is clearly two people in a worm costume, but still insist that they're a real worm.
- Minor Crime Reveals Major Plot: Hilariously subverted. After being called to testify over a sexual harassment lawsuit (which was really just Cartman suing Stan over calling him an "asslicker"), Principal Victoria breaks down and tearfully confesses to committing murder. Gerald and the rest of the court ignore it, being too preoccupied with the sexual harassment case.
- Morton's Fork: While pilfering Stan's room of his belongings, Cartman asks him if he likes certain toys or not. He takes toys that Stan says he likes just to Kick the Dog, then when Stan tries to get wise and says he doesn't like a certain toy, Cartman takes it on the grounds that Stan wouldn't care if it was gone.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: Gerald uses the Aesop of not suing people as an excuse to not face legal retribution for his shadiness.
- Noodle Incident:
- Being cross-examined by Gerald, Principal Victoria confesses to murdering a man, dismembering and attempting to incinerate the body, as well as insisting she had no choice. Before this can go any further, Gerald tells her to focus on the sexual harassment case.
- It's not the first time Skeeter has hassled a panda bear that wandered into the bar.
- Only in It for the Money: During his commercial, Gerald says his lawsuits aren't about money before immediately correcting himself.
- People Fall Off Chairs: The headmaster falls off her chair in the courtroom after hearing the sums the school has to pay for the lawsuits.
- Reverse Psychology Backfire: Stan tries and fails to keep Cartman from taking his beloved dinosaur toy by pretending he doesn't care about it.
- Running Gag: Any scenes with Skeeter and the Bartender have Skeeter saying "Hey, [Person or Group], we don't take kindly to X in here!" with the Bartender saying "Now Skeeter I don't want no trouble.". At the end of the episode, the Bartender tells Skeeter to shut the hell up.
- Runs with Scissors: The Island of Misfit Mascots includes Oinky, the "Run-Around-With-Scissors Pig". When one of the boys points out that's bad advice, they're informed that it's why Oinky is on the island.
- Scales of Justice: The court uses a seal of Lady Justice's face complete with her blindfold and scales.
- Shaming the Mob: Petey the Don't Sue People Panda helps the townspeople realize what their constant lawsuits are doing to the school.
- Shout-Out: The mascot retreat is named after the Island of Misfit Toys.
- Singing Voice Dissonance: When the Panda sings his introductory song, his voice is heavily muffled behind his mask. However, when he talks, his voice is clearly audible.
- Surprise Witness: The kids bring in Sexual Harassment Panda right when Gerald is starting his closing argument in the Everyone vs. Everyone court case
- They Killed Kenny Again: He dies by holding a magnet and is pulled into a giant fan that's turned on.
- This Just In!: The newscaster gets interrupted by an incoming message of himself getting sued by Kyle's dad for slander he uttered seconds ago.
- Throw the Dog a Bone: This is one of the few times Pip gets back at the kids for their abuse by suing Cartman. Even though it was a frivolous lawsuit, it's pretty much his only victory to date.
- Very Special Episode: Parodied, complete with a closing Public Service Announcement against suing people to make money.
